There are many reasons you may be looking at single parenting. Most reasons are unplanned and can be the source of anxiety.
Some of the reasons you might become a single parent:
– Breakup or Divorce
– Spouse in the military
– Unplanned pregnancy
No matter what the reason, you are now looking at being a single parent, it is a change.
Even if it is a relief because you are getting out of an abusive relationship, it can still be stressful. Use our single parenting tips to survive and thrive.
Stay Positive Even When You’re Not
The most important thing is to keep your personal feelings that are negative away from your child or children. Do that privately with a trusted friend. Be positive around your children. It is OK to for them too see you sad, but remind them (and yourself) it will pass and everyone will be OK. Even if their dad was very bad to you or them, they need to come to their own conclusions. A child who hears bad about the absent parent will defend them and take their side. It is best to be neutral if you can’t be positive.
Take time to mourn.
The mourning doesn’t have to be dramatic and tearful. Just take the time to face the things you and your children have lost. Even if it is the loss is the hope that things could’ve gotten better, take time to morn. This is freeing. You will then be able to move forward and replace those losses with something new, positive, and healthy.
Accept that you are a single parent.
Don’t fight it. If the dad is around, don’t try to have him included when it is not appropriate. Make a new life for you and your children. Your children will now have a new life as well. Make the most of it.
You Are Not Alone
Find successful single parents. Find out what they are doing and how you can incorporate what works into your new life. Surround yourself with people who are supportive and positive, it will rub off on you and your children.
Take Care Of You
Even if it is for brief amounts of time at first, make time for yourself. Take care of yourself, rejuvenate yourself, and give yourself quiet peaceful moments. Learn to manage your stress.
Becoming a single parent will not be easy at first but you will manage. Remember that you have hidden strengths; allow them to emerge as you learn how to be a single parent.