It can be one of the greatest moments in many people’s lives once they become parents for the first time. Having your very own children is the start of a new way of life and while it might bring you much happiness, you must be accountable for their health and well being. This is especially true when it comes to steps you’ll want to take to ensure a young child is safe in your own home as many injuries and accidents that occur are avoidable. Here’s some tips that can help to prevent your child from getting seriously hurt in your home.

One of the first milestones for a child occurs when they figure out how to become mobile from crawling through to their first steps. Now, you feel that you must watch your child in every waking moment since they could go off somewhere and put themselves in great danger. Should you have a multi-story home, it is vital that you have a stair gate for both the bottom and top of the stairs. If you have a open fireplace, you want to be sure that you have some type of guard to fence it.

It is obvious to most of us to set medicines in a cupboard that is out of reach to young children but there are many other hazardous toxins such as cleaning products that could have serious implications if swallowed. It is not possible to put everything out of reach therefore simple child security cupboard locks can be fitted where necessary. You’ll be surprised at all the various types of safety locks and guards that are available. It’s most likely a good idea to inspect your home to see what safety hazards you have. Once you have a listing it is then a matter of finding products that can prevent any potential injury. Even though it is a bit of work in the beginning, once it’s done, you’ll know that you will have a safer home for your child.

Don’t forget to ensure your windows and doors in your home are properly secured so your child can’t open them. It really is also very important to check to see if your smoke alarms are working and have fresh batteries. In case you ever have a fire in your home, the smoke alarm will alert you ahead of time so that you and your children can be out of harm’s way. The challenge is to employ a proper escape path but at least your smoke alarm works.

As well as taking into consideration the inside of your home, you should also make any changes to your garden that are required to make it child friendly. A clear example of this is if you have a garden pond which can be an attractive feature but very dangerous for a young child. The best solution is to fill the garden pond. If you don’t want to fill the pond up, then you will really need your pond fenced in.

These are just some of the choices you need to make to keep your children safe and with careful planning you have a greater chance of preventing any serious injuries.

Original post can be found here: How to Keep Your Kids Safe in Your Home

It’s become pretty widely accepted that nagging, whether with spouses or kids, does not work. It can also be exhausting for the one doing the nagging. So why does it not work? Why is nagging considered to be ineffective? Here are some ideas as to why this time-honored method of motivation is anything but motivating.

1. It creates resentment. Nagging may produce an angry response in your spouse or kids, and make them resent you. The task you are nagging about becomes the last thing they want to do.

2. Nagging is unpleasant, so you will get tuned out. No one wants to hear the same old nag over and over, and your spouse and kids will simply stop listening. The more you nag, the less they hear.

3. It’s negative reinforcement, which some psychologists say is ineffective. Nagging says, in effect, “I will stop punishing you with this annoying nagging when you do what I want you to.” And the person being nagged feels that as soon as he or she does one task to make you stop nagging, you will just nag about another one.

4. Nagging can make you feel controlled, and no one likes to feel that way. Being nagged feels like you’re being manipulated, and tends to make the “nag-ee” feel like digging in his or her heels instead of doing what he or she is being nagged to do.

5. Talk is cheap, and nagging comes down to simply words. Spouses and kids find it pretty easy to “duck” annoying words. They have learned that you are just talk, and you’ll eventually end up doing the task yourself; all they have to do is weather the word storm.

6. When it comes to kids, nagging models behavior that you probably don’t want to deal with. After all, nagging is something we can often dish out but not take! If you constantly nag, you may find that your kids begin to communicate with you the same way.

7. Nagging focuses on what a person is not doing. Once again, it has a negative focus. Nagging points out all the things that are wrong with the person, and implies that he or she is not worthy because he or she has not done certain tasks. Nagging is a way of finding fault, and it tends to wear people down instead of build them up.

8. If you nag your spouse, you are acting like his or her parent. When one spouse acts like a parent to the other one, experts say that can really damage a marriage.

Original post can be found here: Why Nagging Doesn’t Work

Learning difficulties are not just a challenge for kids – they can be challenging for parents, too. Is there anything you can do to help your child succeed in school? Here are some strategies for concerned parents for helping their children with learning difficulties do well in school.

1. Don’t look for a cure

As a parent, it may be tempting to try and make the learning difficulty “go away.” While there are things you can do to minimize your child’s struggles, the fact that he or she has a learning difficulty is not going to go away. This is all the more reason to learn coping strategies. Your child needs to be taught how to work with his or her disability, not ignore it.

2. Think beyond school

When you help your child with homework, read books with him or her, and generally engage your child to help his or her learning, you are setting your child up for success beyond school. Children who understand their difficulty and have learned how to confront and deal with it may be more likely to succeed than those children who see themselves as helpless victims of an unfair challenge.

3. Be honest

Well-intentioned parents may try to keep a child’s learning difficulties secret. After all, they don’t want their child to be “labeled,” or they may want to avoid the possibility that their child will use the difficulty as a crutch or excuse. However, some experts believe that keeping the learning difficulty secret may send a message of shame and inadequacy. It’s said that the best approach is to honestly accept the difficulty, face it, and help your child understand and accept it also.

4. The whole person

You can help your child overcome his or her learning difficulties by providing the healthiest lifestyle possible. In fact, experts have pointed out the direct impact that diet and exercise can have on a child’s developing brain. So look into giving your family whole, organic foods, providing playtime and exercise, and practicing the principles of fitness and health.

5. Limit screen time

There have been multiple studies showing the negative effect on the brain that excessive exposure to screen-based media (television, computer screens, etc.) can have. Limiting the time your child spends watching television, DVDs, YouTube, or playing computer games helps get his or her brain in the mode to learn.

Original post can be found here: Learning Difficulties in Children – How Can You Help

Homework can be very challenging, especially for high-energy kids who have a hard time sitting still at school, much less at home. As a parent, you may find yourself at a loss as to how you can help your kids cope with their homework challenges. Here are some tips that may help.

1. Schedule it in

Your kids need to know that you think homework is important. One way to do that is to have a designated “homework time.” This kind of routine can be very helpful for kids, and also establishes homework as an important task with its own allotted time.

Having a designated homework time also gives you more flexibility. That may seem ironic, but you and your child get to decide how many hours are needed, and what time of day those hours can come out of. Letting your child help you decide can also be motivational – that makes it less about the parent telling the child what to do and more about the child working with you to solve a problem.

Another tip about the scheduling – consider setting aside an “academic time” rather than just “homework time.” For example, if your child knows he or she has to spend an hour doing something learning-related, he or she will probably be less likely to hurry carelessly through a homework assignment just to get it done. Your child will understand that if he or she finishes his or her homework early, then he or she must find something else school- or learning-related to do.

2. Check it over

Make it a practice to look over your kids’ homework assignments. You don’t have to nit-pick, but just see that the homework is completed and that there are no glaringly obvious errors.

3. Get to know the teacher

Try to find out your child’s teacher’s expectations regarding homework, so that you can help your child reach those specific goals. It may be surprising how much teachers can differ in their homework expectations.

4. Quiet time

Homework/academic time should be free from noisy distractions if at all possible. Don’t settle down with homework assignments near the telephone, television, or computer, for instance (unless the homework assignment requires research on the computer). Some music is okay, especially if it helps filter out more distractions, such as loud younger siblings or other family member’s television programs. Just make sure the music is not distracting in and of itself.

5. Quiet place

Choose a special place for homework. Your child may come to look forward to settling down in this cozy, customized area of the house. Again guarding against distractions, you can set up the area to have snacks, drinks (even a mini fridge), comfy chairs or cushions, a special desk or table, and so forth.

Original post can be found here: How to Deal with Your Kids’ Homework Challenges

If you are having trouble with your kids at bedtime, maybe a good first step would be to stop thinking of it as a battle. Then, you can be open to some tips and ideas that may help get things peaceful. Here are some suggestions.

Assess Your Approach

When it comes to bedtime, are you trying to follow advice you read about? Or maybe you are doing what your spouse thinks you should do, or your mom, or your in-laws…the point is, why are you approaching bedtime the way you do? If it’s not working, then it might be time to rethink things.

Maybe you’ve been told that children have to be in bed by a certain time and have to fall asleep by themselves in less than 20 minutes. Try breaking out of the expectations of others and instead, think about your individual child’s temperament and your own. Sometimes, it’s just too hard to meet other’s expectations.

Incentives

Now that you are comfortable with taking an approach that’s customized for you and your kids, consider some of these ideas for incentives.

* Let your kids earn tickets or play money at bedtime. For example, if they are in bed by 8 o’clock (or whatever their bedtime is), they earn a certain number of tickets or play dollars. Other behaviors can be reinforced this way, too – staying quiet after lights are out, not getting out of bed until a certain time, etc. can all be reinforced with the tickets.

Behavior you don’t welcome, such as tantrums or jumping out of bed after lights out, could “cost” tickets or play money. Make sure that the amount of tickets or dollars earned is reasonable for your kids’ ages (for example, it won’t mean much if it takes a month for a preschooler to earn enough tickets for a treat – they have a hard time thinking that far ahead).

* Try rewarding good night-time behavior with some extra TV time or play time. This may work better on children past preschool – preschoolers usually need more immediate rewards.

Firm Limits

One of the things that can be challenging is when your kids try to get that one last thing in before going to bed – “Just one more cartoon? Just one more story?” Make sure you and your kids have firm limits established already, so you don’t have to try to figure out if you should give in or not with each request. If the request is not within the limits, then the request isn’t granted.

Routines

It is said that children really do thrive on routine. Routines are different from schedules; they are more individualized. Having a bedtime routine can help a lot. You can even make a big poster or chart with all the bedtime activities listed in order for your child to look at. Routines help children feel secure and will hopefully make them less likely to push the limits as they try to figure out if things are going to be the same or not.

Original post can be found here: How to Tame Bedtime Battles

Is it hard to get your kids to do their chores? It can be a battle to get them to clean up their toys, put away their shoes, do their homework, and other tasks. There are ways you can make chore time a positive experience, and help motivate your kids to get their tasks done. Here are some tips.

Earning Privileges

Psychologists recommend establishing privileges in your home, and then working out a chore schedule that allows kids to earn their privileges. For example, if your young child enjoys playing with his toy cars, set up a chore list where certain chores earn him a half hour of car play time.

The same principle could be applied to a teenager who likes to spend time on social networking, or a preschooler who enjoys playing with blocks. If you make enjoyable tasks into things your children earn, then the chores can be their way to earn these privileges.

Make a Chart

The concept of earning privileges through doing chores may be made easier with a chart. And this gives kids control over what privileges they earn and so forth. It encourages them to participate and get involved rather than avoiding Mom and Dad who are nagging all the time about chores.

For very young children who can’t read, you can use pictures – have a picture of the chore, then a picture of the privilege and draw a line or arrow connecting them. For older kids, you can even have them earn play money with their chores. “Putting away shoes = $3″ for example. Then privileges “cost” certain amounts: “One-half hour of television = $5.” Your kids can “pay” you with the play money. Or you can simply make a chart that shows which chores earn which privileges.

Participate

It’s been said that getting up off your rear and helping your kids get their things done is helpful. It makes sense – kids (and adults) may resent being told to get to work by someone who’s sitting on the couch. So get up and participate – don’t do your kids’ chores for them, but work on your own clean-up chores at the same time, or pick up items you want your kids to put away and hand these to them.

Sometimes, kids – especially young ones – need to be “walked through” a chore. Some kids need for you to point out the toys that have to be put away, or the laundry that’s waiting to be put away.

Games

If possible, make chores into games. Young kids might enjoy pretending to be a clean-up robot. You can pretend to operate the remote with “buttons” for fast, slow, and so forth. Older kids might get a kick out of a trash can mounted on the wall that they can “shoot” for like basketball. Homework is homework, but you can make it a game by letting your kids earn points or treats for each homework assignment they complete.

Original post can be found here: How to Make Chores More Fun for Kids

How to Build Communication Bridges with Your Teen

Raising a child doesn’t come with a book of instructions.  If it did, the task would be much easier.  Facing the teenage years with your son or daughter is not something most parents look forward to.  This article will help you take the experience one day at a time and learn how to bridge the communication gap.

As your child goes from toddler to youngster to tween to teenager, something in what you say gets lost in translation.  They can give you that blank stare as if the words that are coming out of your mouth sound like the unseen teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoons.

It’s not easy to improve the communication bridges with a teen but it’s important to try to get through as these years and the choices they make now will have a vital impact on their future.

Here are a few tips to help you get started:

1. Watch your body language.  How you move says a lot about you.  When a person is tired, they tend to slump.  When angered, your jaw muscles tighten and your eyes narrow into slits.  Believe it or not, teenagers are good at interpreting body language.  Yours will betray you when you are talking to them.  Keep it open and honest.  Avoid sitting with your arms crossed, eyes looking away from them or squirming in your seat.

2. Make eye contact.  When you don’t look at the person you are talking to it says that you are either hiding something or you are not at all interested in what they have to say.  Your teenager will shut down emotionally when they suspect that you are not “tuned in” to them.  Sit comfortably and give your teen undivided attention with consistent eye contact.  It lets them know that you care.

3. Keep your emotions in check.  Remember back to when you were a teenager.  Some of the things you said to your parents were aimed at freaking them out.  Teenagers will push your buttons if they can.  Don’t go overboard and get upset.  Their target is the situations they know make you mad.  Instead, take a deep breath and ignore the taunt.  Do the opposite of what they expect because really, they want you to see through their ploy and find out the real problem.

4. Ask them about their day.  This technique works with spouses also.  Even if your teen only grunts or says the obligatory, “It was okay,” ask anyway.  Your show of caring will go a long way to convince them that you are interested in the things that they do and how they feel.

5. Be honest with them.  If you don’t understand the situation they are talking about then say so.  Kids know when you are being insincere.  Discuss the situation until you get an idea of where they are coming from.  Your teen won’t mind explaining as long as they know you are listening.

6. Allow them their privacy.  This one is tricky and since you know your child better than anyone else, you can draw the line.  Teens value their time alone.  While the policy in your home may be that there are no locks on the doors, always show respect by knocking before entering.  If they don’t want to be pressed about a situation in school, wait until they are ready (if it’s not urgent) and then talk about it.

Parenting a teenager takes a tough skin, a willingness to be vulnerable and lots of love.  You will make mistakes but whatever you do, don’t ever stop talking.

Original post can be found here: How to Build Communication Bridges with Your Teen

Single parenting is the practice of raising children and building a family without a spouse or partner. As a choice of building a family, single parenting is now acceptable in our society. Some sociologist perceive the prevalence of single parenting as an alternative family form rather than a problem in society formation. Regardless of how it is perceived, the increase of families raised by one parent influences the social, economical, and political context of family life. The following are the common causes of single parenting:

1. Divorce – Single parenting due to divorce means that the divorced single parent will have the primary custody of the child or children. The single parent will do the major obligation of raising the child or children but the other parent can still be involved in the family.

The usual pattern after divorce is that the mother becomes the single parent (taking the major obligation of raising the children) while the father becomes the supporting parent. In the United States, five of every six single-parent households are headed by a mother. Fathers, are only given the custody and allowed to play the role of single parent if the parent is widowed, the mother deserted her child or children, or the mother refuses custody of her child. A mother may give up custody and award parenting to the father of child or children due to lack of financial resources, child’s preference living with the father, inability to control or discipline children, threats of legal custody battles, and physical or emotional problems suffered by her.

2. Death – Single parenting due to widowhood may give a parent an unforeseen parenting obligation that will cause her to underwent difficult time of adjustment. Emotions like anger, denial, depression, bargaining, and later acceptance are common to widowed single parents. These negative emotions will largely affect parenting. Support of family and friends are important for the single parent to cope up with the changes in his or her family.

3. Early pregnancy – Raising a child alone during teenage period is tough. Teen single parents underwent stresses because of young age and inability to prepare for the future. Single parenting during teenage years usually happen to kids who are rebellious from their parents.

4. Adoption – Single parenting due to adoption is a viable option for single people who feel incomplete in life. However, loneliness should not be your sole motivation to choose single parenting. It could be a part of it but the desire to nurture and share life as a family should come first. In the United States, single parent adoptions is the fastest growing trend in the adoption field. Single parents due to adoption are usually single parents who work full-time, financially responsible and emotionally mature.

5. Donor insemination – Single parenting due to donor insemination is the most controversial option for building a family today. Donor insemination is the process of achieving pregnancy through injection of semen into the reproductive tract of a female. Single mothers who choose to conceive children in this option include lesbians who wish to bear children. They may choose sperm donor from friends, relatives, acquaintances, or an unknown donor. If the sperm donor is known to the parent or child-bearer, a parent may take parental or avuncular roles relative to children conceived via DI, or may not.

Original post can be found here: What Are The Common Causes of Single Parenting?

Many parents—who have raised their children through single parenting—say that teenagers are the ones that are hard to deal with. This is because they tend to be rebellious and demand for so much explanation when it comes to things as compared with younger kids.

Experts agree that single parenting is much more difficult since parents have to deal with their children who have more issues, questions, and insecurities. There is a great this for this to be addressed properly since young adults are prone to depression that may lead to full blown teen rebellion.

When single parenting is not effective, many issues among teenagers can pile up along with their sadness over the separation. This is because they feel they are being ripped off with people who they feel they can depend on and would give them for support.

Parenting young adults on your own

Studies show that one of the major reasons why there are many single parents who have teen rebels is because the latter feel that they are neglected and somehow abandoned by his or her parents. Because of this mistrust, many of them tend to keep issues on their own and wait until they can no longer handle it.

To be successful in single parenting, it is a must that parents have explained very well to the teenager the real reasons behind the separation for them to gain self-confidence that is crucial for their growth. The best way to explain the separation is by treating them like mature individuals.

Experts say that this is very important for them because they will feel that they are old enough to understand the issues that old people go through. Since they have lots of issues, it would be better to take things slowly and explain the reasons one day at a time.

You can start by explaining the real reason for the break up without having to blame anybody. Then, you can some personal feelings on the separation. Once you got hold of his or her interest, you can try explaining the advantages of the single parenting like being able to give more time to her since your attention won’t be divided anymore. And, you can also try discussing the disadvantages of forcing parents stay together such as frequent arguments and constant fights. To make single parenting easier, one should exert more effort in:

- becoming patient and sensitive. If you notice that the mood of your teenager constantly fluctuates or if he or she loses the drive to do something, it is time to ask what’s wrong and avoid further complications.

- keeping the communication lines open. This is important because it’s an avenue to assure your teenager of your love and support. Opening the lines of communication can also help the teenager to cope up with sadness he or she feels whenever you’re not around.

- being a role model. Showing your teenager positive approaches in dealing with single parenting can help him or her acquire those methods when he/she has to deal with other related issues.

Original post can be found here: Single Parenting Teenagers

Single parenting is one of the most common end results of a failed marriage. For many people, it might seem simple to start a new life and raise their kids after an ended marriage. However, for some it’s difficult to achieve these because of so many factors. These would include their different personalities, upbringing of their respective families, and also of their ways in managing stress brought by the failure of the marriage.

Although separation may indeed affect people in raising their kids and to want more things in their lives, this should not be enough reason just to let the chance of living a better life go. If you think that separation and the thought of being a single parent hinder your process to move on, it’s now time to consider ways that can help you overcome your fears and will pave the way for successful single parenting.

Focusing on the basics

Being a good parent is instinctive to all parents. However, this innate concern for their kids and raising them well may be affected by the events that have occurred in their lives. Their experiences also hinder them to focus on the needs of their children since they cannot help themselves to overcome their problems in life.

Although painful experiences such as separation greatly affect good parenting, there are always ways to overcome these problems and move on. The first thing that you can do is let the past go. Experts say that the first step to be an effective single parent is to deal with depression caused by separation. By learning to let go of the past, you can accept that there are things that are beyond your control. Once you have accepted this, you will be able to forgive yourself and prepare yourself in becoming a single parent.

Next best thing to do is to try to set your own pace. Although it is sometimes good for others to have fast recovery to be able to forget their problems, this is not always healthy says experts because it is only a “band-aid” solution. Many people who face the reality of becoming single parents try so hard to move on by drowning themselves in work. This may work but not for long term goals. Eventually, the person who tries so hard to face the challenges of single parenting becomes so tired and will lead to nervous breakdown. To be an effective single parent, it is best if you set your own pace so you won’t get tired. This will also be beneficial for you because you can rest whenever you want to since nobody is breathing down your neck to do things you are not ready to do.

Lastly, the best way to be successful in single parenting is to always think one step ahead and be positive. Since you will raise the child on your own, it would be best to ahead so you will be able to accomplish goals ahead of time. By doing this, you will also have more opportunities to do things properly.

Original post can be found here: Being Successful In Single Parenting